My boyfriend who is 34 yo was abandoned by his mother when he was 4. We have had a very long relationship and I love him very much. Now I'm older and I'm starting to realize that his abandonment is affecting our relationship a big deal. He was raised by his father only, and I know that usually mothers are the most nurturing and who provide compassion and sentiments to a child, he never had that, so feelings to him are not important, he can not understand when I'm hurt, he doesn't how his behavior hurts me. My big issues are the he has a lot of female friends, it bothers me because he talks to them and does a lot of texting with them. He hardly has any male friends, so it makes feel that because he didn't have a mother, he always wants to be around women, I fee like he feels safe, he wants women's attention, he needs to be liked by women, that's my thinking. Years ago he also wanted to have a 3 person relationship with me and another girl. I tell him how I feel about it and he thinks it's my problem, that I am insecure that's all. I believe any woman would have the same issues I have if the boyfriend would be talking to other women. He says they are only friends, but what can you possibly talk about or text all the time? He has other issues that I think are related to his mom leaving him, he has many addictions, to name some: video game addictions, porn addictions, shoe addictions, he is very extreme about everything. I want to understand him and help him but I don't know if I can or if I even should. He is very controlling, he gets mad and gets very mean with me when I bring up things that bother me (like the female friends). He says he is tired of me having issues all the time. He is very difficult to deal with. I don't don't know what to do. I even thought about leaving the relationship but I don't want to add to his abandonment issues even more, I have hope he can realize that he has a problem. I'm not an expert at this, but it seems to me like he does. Thank youHow do I deal with my boyfriends abandonment issues?
Abandonment issues...my eye!
He was raised by a man that forgot to teach him respect, honesty, sensitivity, empathy, self-control........and probably the difference between right and wrong.
Stop analyzing him or wanting to 'fix' him because you can't!
He's not boyfriend or husband material, move on to a man better suited for you.
The woman marrying this man will have a long difficult life filled with infidelity, abuse, addictions etc.How do I deal with my boyfriends abandonment issues?
And what does this have to do with Marriage %26amp; Divorce. Talk to you BF, we can't speak for him.
You can break up and move on...that's the beauty of dating...if you try someone on and they don't ';fit'; - you can move on!
He definitely has a problem and it is not your fault. He needs some major emotional counseling. I understand that you love him and don't want to add to his abandonment issues, but his problems are not your fault and he is responsible for how he handles a breakup with you, not you. Since he is so tired of you having ';issues all the time'; then it is time for you to move on. You don't need this hassle, and you have done all you can to help him. Think of you now. Good luck.
You have been putting up with a whole lotta bull and making excuses for his unacceptable behavior. He is NOT boyfriend material. You need to wake up and smell the coffee (er um I mean reality). I hope you find the courage to start thinking about yourself and your happiness and your future and stop worrying about someone who will never change - he's making you feel guilty for his rude, inconsiderate mean behavior. . .
at some point you need to stop worrying about him and his issues and worry about yourself and being happy.I have been here and left the relationship and it didnt hurt him at all,he moved on to someone else who puts up with all his ****
He is not going to change and you will have to put up with his faults.So the rest of your life you will live in misery as you are not the one who can help him.He will do just fine without you as he has many female friends that will keep him busy.In other words RUN GIRL and don't look back.Love is too wonderful to waste it on someone who does not give back or doesn't care.
sweety, any man that is willing to bring someone else into your bedroom does not care about you!!!! any man that talks to other women more than he talks to you, does not care about you!!!
wake up and go get someone who love you!!! and not just part of you!!!
Oh, poor guy! what kind of monther would leave their son?! Well, you have to decide if you love him enough to be able to deal with his issues for the rest of your life. He might get better over time but never will be the same to someone who is from a healthy family. I married one so I know! No matter what sad background he had, it doesn't give him the right to mistreat you. Tell him that! If he doesn't change, most likely he will not - sadly, you need to walk when you are still young and attractive!!
Friday, August 20, 2010
I'm falling for my boyfriends stepbrother!!?
Here's the deal. My boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. He tells me he loves me all the time but his actions just don't seem to go with that. He's disrespectful to me and everyone sees it. He goes off with his girl ';friends'; swimming and talks to girls all the time. He cheated on me once in the past and I let it slide. Now, his stepbrother moved in with us and since my BF is off doing other stuff all the time, we have a lot of time alone together and have gotten to know each other very well. He's someone I could see having a future with, but I am unsure how to go about this. We all live together and things are getting pretty intense. What should I do?I'm falling for my boyfriends stepbrother!!?
That's so unfair toward your boyfriend, and it or tell him! Better yet, both.I'm falling for my boyfriends stepbrother!!?
What you need to do is stop thinking of yourself and only your desires. i think that there are to many fish in the sea, to be coming between family, even if it is step family. That is just crossing a line that you don't cross. If you have all these problems with your boyfriend, then possibly you should deal with that, especially before moving on and doing that with his step brother. just because he doesn't treat you the way you'd like, doesn't justify what you are doing behinde his back. YOu infact are the one who let his ways slide, so you really only have yourself to blame. YOu won't fix anything by going for the step brother, and you will be destroying their relationship. Is it that worth it to you, cause chances are you will not always be in either one of their lives, so why would you do something that could ruin their family bond. Sounds VERY selfish and I think you need to deal with your insecurities and learn how to respect yourself before o=you are in a relationship.
hahhahhaha
Follow your heart, you only live once. But most importantly be honest with everyone.
tell him how you feel and if you have more feeling for the other one then go for it dont stay in something ur not happy in and hurt him 2 cause he thinks you feel da same way
!!!!!!!!!]
Move out and get away from both of them. If you stay there only drama will happen, and eventually everyone will know everything. There is no happy ending to your story. Falling in love with best friends or family members is a relationship killer especially if you all live together.
That's so unfair toward your boyfriend, and it or tell him! Better yet, both.I'm falling for my boyfriends stepbrother!!?
What you need to do is stop thinking of yourself and only your desires. i think that there are to many fish in the sea, to be coming between family, even if it is step family. That is just crossing a line that you don't cross. If you have all these problems with your boyfriend, then possibly you should deal with that, especially before moving on and doing that with his step brother. just because he doesn't treat you the way you'd like, doesn't justify what you are doing behinde his back. YOu infact are the one who let his ways slide, so you really only have yourself to blame. YOu won't fix anything by going for the step brother, and you will be destroying their relationship. Is it that worth it to you, cause chances are you will not always be in either one of their lives, so why would you do something that could ruin their family bond. Sounds VERY selfish and I think you need to deal with your insecurities and learn how to respect yourself before o=you are in a relationship.
hahhahhaha
Follow your heart, you only live once. But most importantly be honest with everyone.
tell him how you feel and if you have more feeling for the other one then go for it dont stay in something ur not happy in and hurt him 2 cause he thinks you feel da same way
!!!!!!!!!]
Move out and get away from both of them. If you stay there only drama will happen, and eventually everyone will know everything. There is no happy ending to your story. Falling in love with best friends or family members is a relationship killer especially if you all live together.
How do I deal with my boyfriends crazy mom?!?
Long story short. Me and my boyfriend started dating 02-25-2009 and because of our work schedules I used to stay pretty much every night at his house (from day 1). Me and him have talked about it that's how we both see it. Its a 2 story house the bottom half his mom had redone and they called it his apartment so we both thought that she wouldn't have an issue with it. Turns out she did and she started hating me. Anyway, August of 2009 I found out I was pregnant. I was in between jobs at the time and was working on starting college. His mom told me that if I didn't have an abortion my boyfriend was going to lose the house (which he loved) and she was going to move away and never speak to him again. So I had the abortion and I shouldn't but I felt like he deserved to keep the house. Ever since then she has been a total b*tch non stop. She sold the house ANYWAY and continued to call me a whore, b*tch, etc. My boyfriend has stood up for me a lot but it still bothers me. I don't feel like I made the right decision about the abortion and all of this drama is only making it worse. My whole family disowned me over it and now I still have to deal with her too. Its just not right. I don't want to hate her but I can't help but feel like I do. I've never felt like this towards someone and idk how to handle it. This morning my boyfriend asked me to find a number in his phone and i saw a new girls number in there. I asked about it and apparently now his mom is giving his number out to past girls he has slept with, I asked him to talk to her about interfering with us and he said he would and I do trust him completely (this girl lives like 12 hours away) but I just feel like she should have quit by now. What do I do?
No rude comments about the abortion, you will be reported if you do. Thanks.How do I deal with my boyfriends crazy mom?!?
It's sad that you felt you had to go through that. Just for future reference the way you handle your pregnancy is your choice, don't ever let anyone put your back up against the wall to decide! You family shouldn't hold this against you, by not speaking to you that is horrible as well! What's done is done, and now you are moving on with your life. You are a grown woman and his mother has no right to call you those names! I don't know if she has said them too your face, however if she has I would throw it right back at her! It's nice your BF stands by you, but why are the other girls numbers saved in his phone if his mother is giving his number out? If a girl from his past calls him that he slept with and tells him his mother gave out the number he should tell the girl that his mom is being a sneaky troublemaker and that he is in a relationship so please don't call anymore. He should also get his number changed! I wouldn't care who it was that gave the number out, if I have someone giving my number out to people I don't want to have it and they wont stop at my request then I would change my number and they wouldn't be allowed to have it! Then his mother would get the hint! If I were you I wouldn't go around his mother or allow her to be around you, and in the event that the two of you bumped head I would blast her the moment she decided to disrespect me! Don't worry to much about the abortion you made the choice and that is in your past! No one can judge but god, only he knows what's in your heart! I'm sure his mother is far from perfect! Learn how to give what you get and his mother will leave you alone! Don't let her ignorance consume so much of your thoughts and life! She's a B!t@H! She probably was born a B!t@H, and probably will die a B!t@H! That's how some mothers are and their isn't anything you can do to change her, all you can change is how you deal with her!
Good Luck!How do I deal with my boyfriends crazy mom?!?
I hope she isn't staying with the two of you because that will be a recipe for diaster!! Don't you hate MIL's uggh!
dont be reported me u cant tell me how to answer ur question
put your foot down...tell him ';me or your mom';. the problem with this world is that when people that are bat s*h*i*t crazy enter our lives we want to try to maintain a relationship with them because we feel like we would be hurting them if we stopped talking to them. F*U*C*K em! tell him to drop her like it's hot and if he doesn't want to do that, then you drop him. simple. quit thinking you can't live without somebody and look out for number 1 first (that's you)
No rude comments about the abortion, you will be reported if you do. Thanks.How do I deal with my boyfriends crazy mom?!?
It's sad that you felt you had to go through that. Just for future reference the way you handle your pregnancy is your choice, don't ever let anyone put your back up against the wall to decide! You family shouldn't hold this against you, by not speaking to you that is horrible as well! What's done is done, and now you are moving on with your life. You are a grown woman and his mother has no right to call you those names! I don't know if she has said them too your face, however if she has I would throw it right back at her! It's nice your BF stands by you, but why are the other girls numbers saved in his phone if his mother is giving his number out? If a girl from his past calls him that he slept with and tells him his mother gave out the number he should tell the girl that his mom is being a sneaky troublemaker and that he is in a relationship so please don't call anymore. He should also get his number changed! I wouldn't care who it was that gave the number out, if I have someone giving my number out to people I don't want to have it and they wont stop at my request then I would change my number and they wouldn't be allowed to have it! Then his mother would get the hint! If I were you I wouldn't go around his mother or allow her to be around you, and in the event that the two of you bumped head I would blast her the moment she decided to disrespect me! Don't worry to much about the abortion you made the choice and that is in your past! No one can judge but god, only he knows what's in your heart! I'm sure his mother is far from perfect! Learn how to give what you get and his mother will leave you alone! Don't let her ignorance consume so much of your thoughts and life! She's a B!t@H! She probably was born a B!t@H, and probably will die a B!t@H! That's how some mothers are and their isn't anything you can do to change her, all you can change is how you deal with her!
Good Luck!How do I deal with my boyfriends crazy mom?!?
I hope she isn't staying with the two of you because that will be a recipe for diaster!! Don't you hate MIL's uggh!
Report Abuse
dont be reported me u cant tell me how to answer ur question
put your foot down...tell him ';me or your mom';. the problem with this world is that when people that are bat s*h*i*t crazy enter our lives we want to try to maintain a relationship with them because we feel like we would be hurting them if we stopped talking to them. F*U*C*K em! tell him to drop her like it's hot and if he doesn't want to do that, then you drop him. simple. quit thinking you can't live without somebody and look out for number 1 first (that's you)
How to deal with my boyfriends previous hook ups?
Hey,i'm just after a bit of advice.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year now,and overall we are both happy in the relationship. However, i seem to have a tough time dealing with girls that he has kissed or something has happened with prior to our relationship. See,i've had a couple of short term boyfriends and slept with around 5 boys before we got together. However,he was in a long term relationship with his ex for 4 years through school and college. I have no major issues with that. It's more just stuff that he has gotten up to at uni that bothered me. He's kissed 2 girls he lives with (one of which he cheated on me with,the other he cheated on his ex with) then theres been loads of other girls that he's been out and kissed or something more has happened with (not full blown sex). The girls that stuff has happened with have all been really pretty,so it makes me feel uncomfortable and i end up getting arsey with him which i dont like,and im sure he doesn't either. He recently mentioned that after we met on a night out and we were texting one another that he kissed another girl. Now i know that he was well within his right to do this,i just feel crap and it feels like he has cheated on me again. Im just frustrated with it all,its my problem not his but i just want some advice to help me overcome it. Me and my boyfriend have only really argued over the girl he kissed before we go out,its more of just a problem i keep from him.
Thanks for the advice guys :) xHow to deal with my boyfriends previous hook ups?
Just what is it you want to overcome? The fact that he is still messing around with other girls? Do you actually WANT to be O.K. with that? I don't get it...How to deal with my boyfriends previous hook ups?
if he cheated on you, you have every right in the relationship to dictate who he associates with, although i wouldn't recomend staying in a relationship w someone you cant trust.. sry just my advice
A string of incidents like that and you don't get a picture of what this guy is like? Do you think it will ever change?
You are not being respected and should do yourself a favor and move on.
heey(: x
ughh men. lol
i think you should have a biiiig talk with him about it
and if he argues and shizz,
dont put up with it !
xx
1) If he's cheated on you- why are you still with him???
2) His past is his past- you'll get over it in time hun.
3)If you don't want to leave him, sit down and talk to him. Start the conversation with '; It's not a big issue'; OR '; Please don't make this an argument'; tell him what your finding hard to deal with. If he's real boyfriend material. You guys wont argue and you'll sort stuff out.
Been with my partner for 8 years- there was tonnes of arguments and threats of breaking up in the first 2 years but now he is my best friend and the only way that will ever happen is if you talk. A boy can not be classed as a boyfriend unless you can talk to him right? That's what friends are for
He cheated on you AND other girls. Sounds to me that he sleeps around and cheats a lot.In my opinion once a cheater always a cheater and you deserve better then him.c would advise you to move on and date someone else who does not kiss /hook up with random girls.
PS. Its NOT your problem, its HIS! He should not hook up with other girls.You don't have to put up with his cheating on you.
I feel this is best answered by a great man. Silent Bob, do your thing.
Silent Bob: ';So there's me and Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how it is: you don't wanna know, but you just have to, right? Stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him - how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, and how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah - and I'm okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with them. M茅nage 脿 trois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sort of thing. I mean, I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.
So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? And I just start blasting her. Like, I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her a slut, right? And tell her she was used. I'm... I'm out for blood. I really wanna hurt this girl. I'm like, ';What the **** is your problem?';, right? And she's just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time and it was that place and she doesn't think she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. I'm like, ';Oh, really?'; That's when I look her straight in the eye, I tell her it's over. I walk. It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like... like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But, what I did not get, she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was... she was looking for me, for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away. So I've spent every day since then chasing Amy... so to speak.';
Have you heard of the word ';Self Respect'; ??? Wel, its time to practice that.
I can assure u he's gonna cheat on u again. It's ure call... do u wanna be with a cheater and a liar or do u wanna give ureself a much deserved break and a chance for a healthy relationship.
It doesnt matter how pretty or ugly those girls are, ure bf is a slut. If a slut is what u want, stay with him. But if what u want is a bf, then sweetheart, let me tell u, ure with the wrong guy.
And he lives with them and kisses them and cheats on u? Gosh! How much patience do u have? Patience is not always a good thing. Ure a good woman, go and find a good man.
Here's some advice - paragraphs.
Anywho, to answer your question:
I can see why you might be a little paranoid, but I don't think you have anything to worry about. He seems to be upfront with you, before he mentioned the girl he kissed, and he's obviously told you of other sexual encounters.
He's with you, not them. He sounds like he's honest, and it does sound like you're over-reacting a little.
Try to relax a bit, and TALK to him. Tell him it worries you or whatever. Don't get cagey and be aggressive, but talk it out. I'm sure he'll reassure you.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year now,and overall we are both happy in the relationship. However, i seem to have a tough time dealing with girls that he has kissed or something has happened with prior to our relationship. See,i've had a couple of short term boyfriends and slept with around 5 boys before we got together. However,he was in a long term relationship with his ex for 4 years through school and college. I have no major issues with that. It's more just stuff that he has gotten up to at uni that bothered me. He's kissed 2 girls he lives with (one of which he cheated on me with,the other he cheated on his ex with) then theres been loads of other girls that he's been out and kissed or something more has happened with (not full blown sex). The girls that stuff has happened with have all been really pretty,so it makes me feel uncomfortable and i end up getting arsey with him which i dont like,and im sure he doesn't either. He recently mentioned that after we met on a night out and we were texting one another that he kissed another girl. Now i know that he was well within his right to do this,i just feel crap and it feels like he has cheated on me again. Im just frustrated with it all,its my problem not his but i just want some advice to help me overcome it. Me and my boyfriend have only really argued over the girl he kissed before we go out,its more of just a problem i keep from him.
Thanks for the advice guys :) xHow to deal with my boyfriends previous hook ups?
Just what is it you want to overcome? The fact that he is still messing around with other girls? Do you actually WANT to be O.K. with that? I don't get it...How to deal with my boyfriends previous hook ups?
if he cheated on you, you have every right in the relationship to dictate who he associates with, although i wouldn't recomend staying in a relationship w someone you cant trust.. sry just my advice
A string of incidents like that and you don't get a picture of what this guy is like? Do you think it will ever change?
You are not being respected and should do yourself a favor and move on.
heey(: x
ughh men. lol
i think you should have a biiiig talk with him about it
and if he argues and shizz,
dont put up with it !
xx
1) If he's cheated on you- why are you still with him???
2) His past is his past- you'll get over it in time hun.
3)If you don't want to leave him, sit down and talk to him. Start the conversation with '; It's not a big issue'; OR '; Please don't make this an argument'; tell him what your finding hard to deal with. If he's real boyfriend material. You guys wont argue and you'll sort stuff out.
Been with my partner for 8 years- there was tonnes of arguments and threats of breaking up in the first 2 years but now he is my best friend and the only way that will ever happen is if you talk. A boy can not be classed as a boyfriend unless you can talk to him right? That's what friends are for
He cheated on you AND other girls. Sounds to me that he sleeps around and cheats a lot.In my opinion once a cheater always a cheater and you deserve better then him.c would advise you to move on and date someone else who does not kiss /hook up with random girls.
PS. Its NOT your problem, its HIS! He should not hook up with other girls.You don't have to put up with his cheating on you.
I feel this is best answered by a great man. Silent Bob, do your thing.
Silent Bob: ';So there's me and Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how it is: you don't wanna know, but you just have to, right? Stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him - how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, and how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah - and I'm okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with them. M茅nage 脿 trois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sort of thing. I mean, I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.
So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? And I just start blasting her. Like, I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her a slut, right? And tell her she was used. I'm... I'm out for blood. I really wanna hurt this girl. I'm like, ';What the **** is your problem?';, right? And she's just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time and it was that place and she doesn't think she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. I'm like, ';Oh, really?'; That's when I look her straight in the eye, I tell her it's over. I walk. It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like... like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But, what I did not get, she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was... she was looking for me, for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away. So I've spent every day since then chasing Amy... so to speak.';
Have you heard of the word ';Self Respect'; ??? Wel, its time to practice that.
I can assure u he's gonna cheat on u again. It's ure call... do u wanna be with a cheater and a liar or do u wanna give ureself a much deserved break and a chance for a healthy relationship.
It doesnt matter how pretty or ugly those girls are, ure bf is a slut. If a slut is what u want, stay with him. But if what u want is a bf, then sweetheart, let me tell u, ure with the wrong guy.
And he lives with them and kisses them and cheats on u? Gosh! How much patience do u have? Patience is not always a good thing. Ure a good woman, go and find a good man.
Here's some advice - paragraphs.
Anywho, to answer your question:
I can see why you might be a little paranoid, but I don't think you have anything to worry about. He seems to be upfront with you, before he mentioned the girl he kissed, and he's obviously told you of other sexual encounters.
He's with you, not them. He sounds like he's honest, and it does sound like you're over-reacting a little.
Try to relax a bit, and TALK to him. Tell him it worries you or whatever. Don't get cagey and be aggressive, but talk it out. I'm sure he'll reassure you.
Girls:How many of you have military boyfriends/Boys: How many of you in the military ..?
Girls : How did you deal with the stress of your man going away for training and then going to the middle east, or elsewhere ? How do you keep the love alive ? What did you do your last night together before he went away ? And, how did you react when he told you he was planning on going into the military career track ?
Boys: When leaving your girl, how did you feel? How did you keep the love alive, and what did you do your last night before leaving ?
Im asking this, because I need help dealing. My boyfriend just told me that he is planning on going into the military. His training is 3 provinces over from mine (we live in Canada), and I'm in Uni. He won't be going though, until after Feb. (he promised not to leave before our 2year anniversary). So, can you please tell me your stories and help out ? Thanks in advance :)Girls:How many of you have military boyfriends/Boys: How many of you in the military ..?
I am dating a Marine.. And trust me hun, it is HARD. I live in the US %26amp; my boyfriends training was 3 months long, then he had another month of training after that, and now he's at his MOS school. When he told me he was going into the Marine Corps, I cried my eyes out. But he had warned me that he wanted to when we started dating, and I didn't believe him. Then he turned 17 and him and his parents signed the papers, and that's when it all got so so real to me. I'm 16 %26amp; he's 18. He left for boot camp in June, right after he graduated from high school and I cried for 2 days straight. In the USMC you can't make phone calls.. So I had to sit around and wait for his first letter. I didn't get it til 2 weeks after he left. It made me so so happy to get that letter, I even cried. But after getting his address I wrote a letter every single day. I supported him and was his motivation to keep going. We didn't have a specific way to ';keep the love going'; except in every letter we would tell each other how much we miss each other, can't wait to see one another again, and how much we love each other. The drill instructors tell the recruits to forget about their girlfriends and wives because they're back home cheating on them.. But I would remind him in almost every letter that I would never do that to him. And that I was home waiting for him to come back. After boot camp when he came home the love was still there. It was like we had just seen each other the day before.. Everything was the same. It was the most amazing feeling in the world. The night before he left for boot camp I stayed the night at his house and we just sat up talking allll night long. He hasn't been deployed yet.. He's still in his MOS school, but more than likely it will happen, and all I can do is just support him and let him know I'm here for him. It is an amazing thing these guys do.. And they don't need any extra stess. Just let your boyfriend know you'll back him up all the way.. And you'll be waiting for him.
Best of luck.Girls:How many of you have military boyfriends/Boys: How many of you in the military ..?
Im still young and not married so I cannot answer but the first person who answered this question is very sweet. I am so happy for her and her love is still between her and her fiance. I wish them the best ans she should get Best Answer.shared hosting web ftp hosting
Boys: When leaving your girl, how did you feel? How did you keep the love alive, and what did you do your last night before leaving ?
Im asking this, because I need help dealing. My boyfriend just told me that he is planning on going into the military. His training is 3 provinces over from mine (we live in Canada), and I'm in Uni. He won't be going though, until after Feb. (he promised not to leave before our 2year anniversary). So, can you please tell me your stories and help out ? Thanks in advance :)Girls:How many of you have military boyfriends/Boys: How many of you in the military ..?
I am dating a Marine.. And trust me hun, it is HARD. I live in the US %26amp; my boyfriends training was 3 months long, then he had another month of training after that, and now he's at his MOS school. When he told me he was going into the Marine Corps, I cried my eyes out. But he had warned me that he wanted to when we started dating, and I didn't believe him. Then he turned 17 and him and his parents signed the papers, and that's when it all got so so real to me. I'm 16 %26amp; he's 18. He left for boot camp in June, right after he graduated from high school and I cried for 2 days straight. In the USMC you can't make phone calls.. So I had to sit around and wait for his first letter. I didn't get it til 2 weeks after he left. It made me so so happy to get that letter, I even cried. But after getting his address I wrote a letter every single day. I supported him and was his motivation to keep going. We didn't have a specific way to ';keep the love going'; except in every letter we would tell each other how much we miss each other, can't wait to see one another again, and how much we love each other. The drill instructors tell the recruits to forget about their girlfriends and wives because they're back home cheating on them.. But I would remind him in almost every letter that I would never do that to him. And that I was home waiting for him to come back. After boot camp when he came home the love was still there. It was like we had just seen each other the day before.. Everything was the same. It was the most amazing feeling in the world. The night before he left for boot camp I stayed the night at his house and we just sat up talking allll night long. He hasn't been deployed yet.. He's still in his MOS school, but more than likely it will happen, and all I can do is just support him and let him know I'm here for him. It is an amazing thing these guys do.. And they don't need any extra stess. Just let your boyfriend know you'll back him up all the way.. And you'll be waiting for him.
Best of luck.Girls:How many of you have military boyfriends/Boys: How many of you in the military ..?
Im still young and not married so I cannot answer but the first person who answered this question is very sweet. I am so happy for her and her love is still between her and her fiance. I wish them the best ans she should get Best Answer.
How can i make my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's life miserable?
Okay, here's the deal...My boyfriend of three years just dumped me over a text message not even two weeks ago. he had been acting super sketchy like leaving the house early, ditching me on his lunch breaks, finding reasons to go out with his friends a lot, etc. Well, comes to find out he's already dating somebody else. i want to screw with their lives (not legally just make things kinda hard for them). what are a couple ';pranks'; that would be good to do?How can i make my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's life miserable?
Move on.How can i make my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's life miserable?
grow up. this is childish and immature. he's not worth it and ur giving him too much credit by caring enough to do this. it'll just make u look the loser ex-girlfriend who cant move on with her life. plus, how would u like it if u started dating a guy and there was a bitter ex who kept bothering you? she didnt do anything wrong, from what uve written. seriously, ull just look pathetic. start dating a new guy. living well is the best revenge
What did she ever do to you? Do you even know her? She might have even been unaware he had a girlfriend when they met.
tell her your old bf has genetile warts
Move on.How can i make my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's life miserable?
grow up. this is childish and immature. he's not worth it and ur giving him too much credit by caring enough to do this. it'll just make u look the loser ex-girlfriend who cant move on with her life. plus, how would u like it if u started dating a guy and there was a bitter ex who kept bothering you? she didnt do anything wrong, from what uve written. seriously, ull just look pathetic. start dating a new guy. living well is the best revenge
What did she ever do to you? Do you even know her? She might have even been unaware he had a girlfriend when they met.
tell her your old bf has genetile warts
How can i deal with my boyfriend's epilepsy?
My name was diagnosted with epilepsy about 3 yrs ago after a fall he took while playing basketball. He fell and hit his head on the court. He has been having seizures ever since. I receiving found out he had epilepsy when he had a seizure at my house. When he has them, im scared to death. He takes medication but it doesnt seem to work. He has them while he sleeps and thats the only time. Any tips on how i can deal with it?How can i deal with my boyfriend's epilepsy?
You Can Help Your boyfriend to Feel Less Alone
If someone under your care has epilepsy, it is important that you talk to that person about how she or he is feeling. Many people with epilepsy worry about having a seizure in public and may stay at home more often than they would like. You can help loved ones with epilepsy feel less isolated by reaching out to them and letting them know that they don鈥檛 have to deal with their epilepsy all by themselves.
You Can Help Make Living with Epilepsy More Manageable for Your boyfriend:
Epilepsy can affect your loved one鈥檚 everyday life. Simple things such as going to work or driving a car may not be possible. Your loved one may be constantly worried that another seizure will come on at any time.
There are other things you can do that may help make living with epilepsy more manageable for your loved one.
Encourage that person to join an epilepsy support group. It may help your loved one to hear from others who are going through similar experiences with epilepsy and who understand how your loved one is feeling
Help all members of the family learn more about epilepsy. This will enable the family to provide the support your loved one needs
If the person attends school, discuss this with the doctor as well as the teacher. The more informed the school is about epilepsy, the better prepared it will be to respond to the student's needs
If the person is employed, discuss the best way to approach this situation in the workplace, given the specific circumstances of your loved one's job
Make sure he or she wears a medical alert necklace or bracelet. These items provide important information that can help others know what to do and who to call if the person is experiencing a seizure
Encourage the use of public transportation. Just because epilepsy prevents some people from being able to drive shouldn't mean they have to sit at home. Many areas have convenient, affordable public transportation options that can help your loved one get out there and get on with everyday life
There are many other things you can do to make it easier for your loved one to live with epilepsy. Talk to your loved one and to the doctor to find out additional ways you may be able to help.
You Can Help Your Friend or Loved One Find the Right Treatment
You may be the key to helping those under your care get the right treatment that may finally help get their epilepsy under control. You may want to think about speaking directly with a health care professional who understands your situation and who can give you advice on treatment and ongoing care.
You can help your loved ones get the treatment that is right for them. You can also encourage them to take their medication in the way their doctor has prescribed.
LYRICA is an effective medication that helps reduce seizures in people who are taking other drugs to treat this condition. You may want to ask the doctor if LYRICA could be right for your loved one.
Where to Find Support
There are Places to Turn for Help
You should know that there is support out there. The following Web sites offer helpful information and support tools.
These Web sites are neither owned nor controlled by Pfizer. Pfizer is not responsible for the content or services on these sites.
National Family Caregivers Association
http://www.nfcacares.org
Epilepsy.com
http://www.epilepsy.com
Epilepsy Foundation of America
http://www.efa.orgHow can i deal with my boyfriend's epilepsy?
I have Epilepsy with sudden death seizures,actually he doesn't have Epilepsy-because epilepsy is when you only have seizures when you are awake.I know-I have had these seizures for over 30 years.Your boyfriend is a Narcoleptic -meaning he only has seizures while he sleeps.If he just recently started having seizures,what kind of medicine is he on? Maybe it is the wrong kind of medicine,my medicine has changed 3 times already.Also,do not be afraid of him,that is the worst thing that you can do-it sends a message to him,that you don't care enough know,trust me-it happened to me.Just stay with him,and make sure he doesn't bang his head on anything,and let the seizure run it's course.Also,does your boyfriend have a neurologists? If not,he should,he can get more help from a neurologist than any other doctor.
Really, the only thing YOU can do to deal with it is be there for him and don't let him see your fear or sadness. He needs you as a support as this is probably very embarassing to him. If you're around him when he's seizing, just keep him safe; remove objects from around him that can hurt him and keep yourself safe by staying back as there's nothing you can do for him physically at this point. And, remember to remind him to avoid playing video games and flashing lights or anything which can trigger a seizure. As for the medication not working, he may want to talk to his MD about increasing his current dose or trying something else if they're occurring frequently.
It's not easy... my ex-husband has seizures that were basically uncontrolled by medicine, and also had them primarily in his sleep. The best thing I can say is to stay calm while its happening, and while it looks painful and like they might die, he really won't and he is not aware at all about what's going on. It looks much scarier than it is. Keep that in mind as you witness the event. Don't treat him differently.
He should try to take his medication about 3 hrs before he goes to sleep (I am not a dr, just talking from personal experience - please ask a dr!!!) so that an adequate amount is in the bloodstream for when he goes to bed. Sometimes they think if they take it right before bed, they are ';covered.'; Also, have him ask his Dr about newer meds, like Lamictal that have worked wonders with my ex.
I can't tell you don't be scared, they are scary to watch, but get educated about basically leaving them alone (remove sharp objects, don't stick anything into the mouth, loosen clothing that may be around the neck and if you can, nudge him to his side so the blood that comes out of his mouth~usually from biting his tongue~drains out the side) Always tell him he just had a seizure. You can pat his back, and just say something like ';baby, it'll be okay'; while he is seizing... it really helped me, I guess threw me into caregiver mode which took the focus off of my fears.
Again, look at the situation differently~ he won't die, he doesn't feel a thing, he won't remember it, and it only lasts a very short time (seems like eternity to you, but most don't even last 2 minutes).
He'll be okay.
Go to his dr. or try another one...some kind of seizures are best helped with a ';cocktail'; of meds...
Note: Please don't feel like you have to stay with him in the event you don't like him anymore (not necessarily because of the seizures.) The best thing is to treat him like everyone else. He is a regular person!
Support him....and tell him that he has seizures in his sleep...it's important that his doctors know this.
You Can Help Your boyfriend to Feel Less Alone
If someone under your care has epilepsy, it is important that you talk to that person about how she or he is feeling. Many people with epilepsy worry about having a seizure in public and may stay at home more often than they would like. You can help loved ones with epilepsy feel less isolated by reaching out to them and letting them know that they don鈥檛 have to deal with their epilepsy all by themselves.
You Can Help Make Living with Epilepsy More Manageable for Your boyfriend:
Epilepsy can affect your loved one鈥檚 everyday life. Simple things such as going to work or driving a car may not be possible. Your loved one may be constantly worried that another seizure will come on at any time.
There are other things you can do that may help make living with epilepsy more manageable for your loved one.
Encourage that person to join an epilepsy support group. It may help your loved one to hear from others who are going through similar experiences with epilepsy and who understand how your loved one is feeling
Help all members of the family learn more about epilepsy. This will enable the family to provide the support your loved one needs
If the person attends school, discuss this with the doctor as well as the teacher. The more informed the school is about epilepsy, the better prepared it will be to respond to the student's needs
If the person is employed, discuss the best way to approach this situation in the workplace, given the specific circumstances of your loved one's job
Make sure he or she wears a medical alert necklace or bracelet. These items provide important information that can help others know what to do and who to call if the person is experiencing a seizure
Encourage the use of public transportation. Just because epilepsy prevents some people from being able to drive shouldn't mean they have to sit at home. Many areas have convenient, affordable public transportation options that can help your loved one get out there and get on with everyday life
There are many other things you can do to make it easier for your loved one to live with epilepsy. Talk to your loved one and to the doctor to find out additional ways you may be able to help.
You Can Help Your Friend or Loved One Find the Right Treatment
You may be the key to helping those under your care get the right treatment that may finally help get their epilepsy under control. You may want to think about speaking directly with a health care professional who understands your situation and who can give you advice on treatment and ongoing care.
You can help your loved ones get the treatment that is right for them. You can also encourage them to take their medication in the way their doctor has prescribed.
LYRICA is an effective medication that helps reduce seizures in people who are taking other drugs to treat this condition. You may want to ask the doctor if LYRICA could be right for your loved one.
Where to Find Support
There are Places to Turn for Help
You should know that there is support out there. The following Web sites offer helpful information and support tools.
These Web sites are neither owned nor controlled by Pfizer. Pfizer is not responsible for the content or services on these sites.
National Family Caregivers Association
http://www.nfcacares.org
Epilepsy.com
http://www.epilepsy.com
Epilepsy Foundation of America
http://www.efa.orgHow can i deal with my boyfriend's epilepsy?
I have Epilepsy with sudden death seizures,actually he doesn't have Epilepsy-because epilepsy is when you only have seizures when you are awake.I know-I have had these seizures for over 30 years.Your boyfriend is a Narcoleptic -meaning he only has seizures while he sleeps.If he just recently started having seizures,what kind of medicine is he on? Maybe it is the wrong kind of medicine,my medicine has changed 3 times already.Also,do not be afraid of him,that is the worst thing that you can do-it sends a message to him,that you don't care enough know,trust me-it happened to me.Just stay with him,and make sure he doesn't bang his head on anything,and let the seizure run it's course.Also,does your boyfriend have a neurologists? If not,he should,he can get more help from a neurologist than any other doctor.
Really, the only thing YOU can do to deal with it is be there for him and don't let him see your fear or sadness. He needs you as a support as this is probably very embarassing to him. If you're around him when he's seizing, just keep him safe; remove objects from around him that can hurt him and keep yourself safe by staying back as there's nothing you can do for him physically at this point. And, remember to remind him to avoid playing video games and flashing lights or anything which can trigger a seizure. As for the medication not working, he may want to talk to his MD about increasing his current dose or trying something else if they're occurring frequently.
It's not easy... my ex-husband has seizures that were basically uncontrolled by medicine, and also had them primarily in his sleep. The best thing I can say is to stay calm while its happening, and while it looks painful and like they might die, he really won't and he is not aware at all about what's going on. It looks much scarier than it is. Keep that in mind as you witness the event. Don't treat him differently.
He should try to take his medication about 3 hrs before he goes to sleep (I am not a dr, just talking from personal experience - please ask a dr!!!) so that an adequate amount is in the bloodstream for when he goes to bed. Sometimes they think if they take it right before bed, they are ';covered.'; Also, have him ask his Dr about newer meds, like Lamictal that have worked wonders with my ex.
I can't tell you don't be scared, they are scary to watch, but get educated about basically leaving them alone (remove sharp objects, don't stick anything into the mouth, loosen clothing that may be around the neck and if you can, nudge him to his side so the blood that comes out of his mouth~usually from biting his tongue~drains out the side) Always tell him he just had a seizure. You can pat his back, and just say something like ';baby, it'll be okay'; while he is seizing... it really helped me, I guess threw me into caregiver mode which took the focus off of my fears.
Again, look at the situation differently~ he won't die, he doesn't feel a thing, he won't remember it, and it only lasts a very short time (seems like eternity to you, but most don't even last 2 minutes).
He'll be okay.
Go to his dr. or try another one...some kind of seizures are best helped with a ';cocktail'; of meds...
Note: Please don't feel like you have to stay with him in the event you don't like him anymore (not necessarily because of the seizures.) The best thing is to treat him like everyone else. He is a regular person!
Support him....and tell him that he has seizures in his sleep...it's important that his doctors know this.
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