Decide what you want from her and expect from her and then sit her down and tell her in a calm, compassionate tone of voice. Make her a cup of hot tea, coffee, cocoa, or whatever while you're talking so that you'll have her seated and she'll be more likely to not storm out if she feels offended. Using the compassionate tone will also help so that you don't seem like someone trying to run her life. Yeah, she's screwing up big time but the purpose of the talk is to make things better for her daughter and for you.
Keep your goals in mind. For example, tell her that you're concerned that her daughter hasn't seen her very much lately. Ask her about her living situation. See if she is looking for work and ask her what she wants to do for a living so that you can see if you know somewhere for her to look. Ask if she's looking forward to the new baby. Generally, talk to her like she's a person so that you take your own feelings out of the equation then she won't be able to say that she's not around for her daughter because you dislike her and so that she can start to work toward her other goals. Each time you see her, ask her about the things you talked about - like, ';How's the job hunt going?'; or whatever. It will help her to keep those goals in mind. The better the ex is doing, the better your life will be.HOW TO DEAL WITH MY BOYFRIENDS EX WIFE?
I have to deal with an ex wife also. My best advice is to not deal with her, dont get involved with her if you dont have to. It usually causes more problems. Your BF should be the one that deals with her. Just do the best you can for the childs sake. The little girl is the one that will have to deal with more of her mom when she gets older.
I find good advice at the group below.
If you can't control yourself around her avoid talking to her or being in the room with her. Tell you bf from now on you will not deal with this woman and he should do the talking to her. You can never say anything negative about her in front of her child. You must always behave civilly towards her. In the end how she chooses to live her life is not your business.
You have no reason to ';deal'; with her at all.
Let your boyfriend man up and ';deal'; with her. What she does is none of your business.
I don't think i'd be able to answer your question properly because i've never dealt with it before. However you seem like you really need an answer so i'd say the only place that would really help you is dating reform. It's a site I use where anyone from anywhere in the world that went through the same experiences/problems as you're going through and had the same questions that you had are able to post their own advice on the topic for other people such as yourself to read. I believe they're even running a contest where whoever posts the most advice and helps the most people earns themselves $500. So you should be able to get some decent help. Check it out hopefully it'll help you with your current questions and any others that you might need help with. The site again is datingreform.c o m
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