Friday, August 20, 2010

I need advice on how to deal with my boyfriends family!!?

i hav been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 yrs and the whjole time his family have never made me feel welcome whenever i am over or whenever i go somewhere with them, his sister hates me and bitches about me all the time to her mum and my boyfriend doesnt know what to do about it. i hav tried talking to his mum to get to know her better but the nice-ness only lasts a little bit. his sister always ignores me and i feel very uncomfortable around all of them. my boy knows this and doesnt know what to do either. We recently broke up and are currently in the middle of putting things back together which is double as stressful and produces many unknown feelings to me and i sometimes get severly depressed about it all coz i just want everything to b ok %26amp; i dont know how to fix it. I dont know wether anti-depressants will help me. So basically i need advice on my boyfriends family, my relationship and anti-depressants haha what a mess. please help so confused!I need advice on how to deal with my boyfriends family!!?
If you really care for him and your relationship, work on it, but be aware that there may never be peace in that family... some families are just like that.


As far as the family, forget them. Seems like you've made the effort, now it is up to them. Sometimes it's more excitement for a bitter family to have someone to hate then to be open, accepting, and loving. I personally wouldn't put anymore effort into it...It would hurt, but I don't believe in putting myself out there for others to hurt me.


Antidepressants are wonderful drugs for those that need them. I don't know how old you are, but there is clinical depression and situational depression. If this is situational, then you need to break loose from the situation totally. Don't put yourself through it, it's not worth it! If it's clinical, you need to see a doc and let him/her deside.I need advice on how to deal with my boyfriends family!!?
I dealt with something similar my daughters dad family was so great to me during our almost 3 year relationship and post breakup after finding out I was preggers...well that didn't last long after giving birth to a 1lb preemie his family basically shut the door in my face. They totally disassociated themselves with me. Now that my daughter is older and healthy they want to be in our lives.


Point...every time he freaked out and snapped off on his fam they would back down...there's nothing you can do sweetie because you're not the problem!!! His family is and you don't deserve the stress, drama, and intensity of having to deal with that. If your boyfriend after 3 years cant break the barriers it might be time you guys dissipate the relationship.


Think about it? After 3 years if he doesn't know that in his heart that you mean that much to him to put his foot down with his family...will he ever. Taking anti-depressants isn't your common cold and sinus medication depression is a serious disease not a condition and you shouldn't allow yourself to be put through such tumultuous ordeals for another human being regardless of who he is to you at heart. What's more important....pleasing your boyfriends family or your well being?
Be yourself and don't put on aires. Kill with kindness and compassion. Show that you are the bigger person and are above all this. You boy should say something to his sister and tell her to stop saying things about you and keep any and all opinions to herself. You can't change anyone but yourself. But don't give up your self respect and stoop to there level of hate. Sister's have a way of making all future women (threats) fell very unwelcome into a family. Kinda like lionness in a pride of females, the dominate ones show that they are incharge and challenge all outsiders who try and get in. God Bless and Good Luck.
Wow.


thats a bit hard...


i think that you should find out what the family likes to do.


like, ask ur BF what his mum likes to do, mabey you have these things in common, then you have something to relate to.


for example, if she really likes shopping, invite her to a shopping trip.


And if you boyfriend knows this, then ask him to help you through this.


i really hope this helps you.


goodluck!!!


ritzi

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